"Never frown even when you are sad, because you never know who is falling in love with your smile.".

I am finally making progress towards change in my life! I went to the doctor yesterday for a second opinion, yet unfortunately I couldn't be examined because I started my period two weeks early! Anyways, she ordered an ultrasound which I will obtain next Friday so the doctor's can see what else may be wrong with me before surgery. The doctor I saw referred me to a cancer specialist, so I am waiting to see what is up with her referral. She hasn't called me back yet. At least I am seeing doctors though instead of trying to ignore my problem. My pain is becoming more difficult to ignore, because case in point....I almost passed out on the way to work yesterday because I was in so much pain. I can't take my strong pain medication and drive or think straight, so I really need to determine a solution. It sounds like drugs are my only option, because the doctor told me I could suffer in pain my entire life even with a hysterectomy. I felt so happy G was able to attend my doctor's appointment with me so he could hear the dismal news himself. I think he was more upset than I, but the doctor didn't tell me anything new other than referring me to a cancer specialist! I used all my sick leave and don't want to use my vacation, since I am taking a week off in December. I hope I get an answer soon.

I am so proud of myself because I finally applied for two jobs today. Both jobs are very similar, but one salaried and the other a contracted position. Both would be so much less stressful than my current job. I couldn't even fathom having such a fun, stressless job at this point, so I am hoping and praying I get one of the positions. I just hope I don't have a far commute.

G and I may purchase another baby. It is a little boy who would be 3.5 lbs full grown. We could then breed him with our little gal if we choose. We are trying to negotiate on the price since we have to pay for airfare too.

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