Sly Little Fox...

Today at 2pm G told me he wanted to do "something" tonight and said I should meet him at work as soon as I finish my job for the day. He neglected to tell me his company Christmas Party was tonight. I show up to the party in my professional "court" attire, drained from a busy day at work. He kept asking me if something was wrong, which only continued to drive me crazy. Of course I am going to be a little upset if he can't provide me with prior warning regarding his company party. Throughout the evening he introduced me to all his work acquaintances. I felt an odd tension when he introduced me to a group of female workers. All shook my hand except for one woman, which G neglected to introduce me to. There were awkward glances and he finally blurted...oh an odd thing about (the one woman) is that her boyfriend lives in another city. Ok???? Awkward silence... I didn't really think about it until we arrived home and I felt irate, but I have to wonder if he has a personal relationship with this woman? On the other hand, maybe I am just too paranoid. I have to wonder though, since a once unstoppable G now shows NO interest in our love life.

I hate secrets. If everyone told the truth, life would be so much easier. If G and I had been honest from the beginning of our relationship we wouldn't be together now, because we were both in love with other people. I want a one woman man...Period! I would rather know than continue to pretend as if everything is fine. I attempted to speak with G tonight after we arrived home, but he wasn't interested. He first went out and drank with our neighbors for an hour then came home and went to bed after talking to his mom on the phone. Of course, my mind is racing and I can't sleep right now. For the last 3 hours I have been decorating my house for Christmas in a futile attempt to rid my mind of the disturbing thoughts emanating from my probable paranoia. I truly hope I am just being paranoid...Again!

Comments

Anonymous said…
You know, it just doesn't seem like it should be that hard to me, being devoted to one person. It sure seems to be, though, and not just for men, either. My ex-wife sure did a lot of that kind of flirting, even though I'd ask her to stop. In retrospect, I should have taken it as a sign.

And, for what it's worth, a little more notice and consideration doesn't seem that hard, either. I mean, what if you'd been in a different outfit that wasn't appropriate for an office party? Besides, any guy should know that women like a little preparation time for a big event where they're expected to be "on" and meet people. Not sure what to say about the percieved tension with the female coworkers, except that you're right to follow it up with some conversation. Especially about that girl he didn't introduce you to. It might just be that he's been complaining about you to them, especially her, but, then again, you won't know until you set your mind at ease. Don't torture yourself. Be open, be honest, be direct, but be sure.
12/04/2005 7:26 AM
Soul Searching said…
The worst thing in the world is wondering and wondering, and letting it consume your thoughts, and still not knowing the truth. If you have the feeling it will be hard to break. You have to talk to him again. It may very well be nothing, but I'd think that if it was truly nothing he'd probably not have a problem talking about it. Than again, I don't know him.

Best of luck with this one. It's such a tough situation, so just follow your heart.
12/04/2005 10:54 AM
Searching for the Answers... said…
Thanks for the feedback! I think I am just being paranoid, but one never knows.
12/05/2005 10:05 PM
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