Searching for the Answers...

I am feeling much calmer than my last post. I decided to be an hour late picking G up from the airport. He was a little pissed. I don't think I've ever been so angry with him, but I think I got the message across. He didn't speak the entire 1.5 hour ride home, or for 3 days later. I think we may have worked out some issues. G has been doing all the house work lately and making meals. The house is actually clean to my standards, not his usual disaster mode. I opened my own checking account again and planned to transfer the difference between his personal spending and mine- several thousand dollars, but I haven't yet. I know once he finds out he will be angry. I just have to decide when I am ready for that battle. I am a few clicks away from doing it when I decide. He also cut back on his spending since returning, I think only purchasing milk in the last week. I've still been working my ass off at work and actually feel sad that I have to stop and take time off. I rea

What happens when attempts are made to express your concerns about constantly being disrespected and you aren't even heard? How about realizing that you can't make someone change, yet aren't willing to live without the changes. At what point is enough, enough? I just don't think I can do it anymore... For some reason G thinks he is super special and superior to all. The laws and rules that would apply to everyone else just don't apply to him, because he is better than everyone else. How is it that we have a so called "budget" that we initially discussed together, yet somehow it doesn't apply to him? It doesn't apply because it was all my idea and he supposedly didn't have any input. We built an amount into our budget for each one of us to spend each month with no questions asked; so why does this amount not apply to him? I didn't spend all of mine and put it into a savings account and somehow that wasn't fair, because I was hoarding mo

I have been feeling so angry towards G and I don't know if anything is salvageable at this point. I don't know how to get beyond these feelings of frustration and anger I have towards him. Part of me wonders if I am being unfair and unreasonable. If I am, I don't know how to not be in this situation? Since G lost his job I feel that he could be helping out a lot more than he is. He is leaving tomorrow super early (I have to drive him to the airport at 6 am 80 miles away!), when I have to work till about 10 pm tomorrow. I am a little pissed, as this is for a supposed job interview up North near our families, but it really isn't. It is a front for him to go screw off and go skiing for 4 days. I would normally think ok, great, he deserves some time off an a break. However, after the last 1.5 weeks I don't think so. I've been working my ass of with 80 or more hours per week. I worked almost all last weekend, yet why is the house still a disaster now that he has all

Well I have mixed news. First, we are first in line to get on the main list for our adoption, meaning we will soon be in the pool for birthmoms to choose from. After this great news, I felt like my luck was finally changing and I actually received positive news for once. Then, I get home and G is home super early. I ask why and he said he was laid off! I couldn't believe it. Now our income is down to 1/3 of what it was before. I thought G would decide to actually help out around the house now, but I was wrong. It has almost been one week and he has washed the dishes, unloaded the dishwasher and spent the whole week screwing off on the internet and watching tv. I'm sorry, but I have been working 80+ hours per week and I get that level of help? It really pisses me of to be frank, because I am not feeling well, needed to work less because I am so exhausted, but now I have to work more and G is a lazy ass that I am now supporting. It just really pisses me off. Now, he has been g