Time.......................................So Slow!!!
Yesterday we received some exciting and possibly devastating news. I hardly slept last night and can't seem to focus! Why does time have to pass so slowly when we want it to speed up, yet pass so quickly when we want it to slow?
Yesterday I received a call stating that G and I needed to call before a certain time for an important conference call. It was the middle of my work day and I suspected the news, but couldn't get a hold of G. He was in an all day meeting from 6 am to 10 pm- his new typical work day at his wonderful new job that pays him a salary, so he does not get overtime for his insane work schedule (I'm just a little upset about this). Anyway, I felt crazy and upset because G would not answer his phone or emails. I finally got to speak with him and we were on the conference call, then we all got cut off. It seems that life just doesn't want to cooperate sometimes! After we eventually all got back on the phone we were told that we were picked by a birth family to adopt their 4 month old daughter. However, we were also told not to get our hopes up, as it may not happen. Consents are supposed to be signed on Friday. Thus we are left waiting and wondering...are we going to be parents on Friday or not? This is a major life changing event and we have no clue if it will happen. How am I not supposed to be ecstatic and so excited when I've waited for this for 6 years? In my head I keep saying it will happen if meant to be, but I admit I will be so sad if it doesn't. I don't know how I'm not supposed to get excited????
In addition the last month has been crazy!!! We scheduled with the infertility doctor who said I "should consider" getting a rubella vaccine. He did not make it mandatory to be treated my him. However, when I called to say I couldn't find just the rubella shot they said I would not be seen or treated unless I get it some how. I hate vaccines and drug companies and it is a huge deal for me to even agree to one vaccine; but to tell me I have to get 3 vaccines (the MMR) when I "should get" the rubella to appease this doctor pisses me off! So I am in this place of deciding to get the damn shot and put off trying for kids for another 2+ months, not going through with infertility, or finding a new doctor. Regardless of my decision, I only have about 2-8 months left in this "window" the doctor said I had to try and get pregnant....basically the last one I will have. It is just an emotional and crazy time for us. It doesn't seem fair that I have this small window of trying for kids and then we are done and I am stuck with this crazy doctor who won't treat me unless I get these vaccines that make me wait for at least another 2 months to try. I feel so frustrated!!!!! Does anyone know how I can get a vaccination record and make it look like I got the dam vaccines? My mom hasn't returned my calls to see if she still has mine from childhood. This whole process is such a mess!!!!!
Yesterday I received a call stating that G and I needed to call before a certain time for an important conference call. It was the middle of my work day and I suspected the news, but couldn't get a hold of G. He was in an all day meeting from 6 am to 10 pm- his new typical work day at his wonderful new job that pays him a salary, so he does not get overtime for his insane work schedule (I'm just a little upset about this). Anyway, I felt crazy and upset because G would not answer his phone or emails. I finally got to speak with him and we were on the conference call, then we all got cut off. It seems that life just doesn't want to cooperate sometimes! After we eventually all got back on the phone we were told that we were picked by a birth family to adopt their 4 month old daughter. However, we were also told not to get our hopes up, as it may not happen. Consents are supposed to be signed on Friday. Thus we are left waiting and wondering...are we going to be parents on Friday or not? This is a major life changing event and we have no clue if it will happen. How am I not supposed to be ecstatic and so excited when I've waited for this for 6 years? In my head I keep saying it will happen if meant to be, but I admit I will be so sad if it doesn't. I don't know how I'm not supposed to get excited????
In addition the last month has been crazy!!! We scheduled with the infertility doctor who said I "should consider" getting a rubella vaccine. He did not make it mandatory to be treated my him. However, when I called to say I couldn't find just the rubella shot they said I would not be seen or treated unless I get it some how. I hate vaccines and drug companies and it is a huge deal for me to even agree to one vaccine; but to tell me I have to get 3 vaccines (the MMR) when I "should get" the rubella to appease this doctor pisses me off! So I am in this place of deciding to get the damn shot and put off trying for kids for another 2+ months, not going through with infertility, or finding a new doctor. Regardless of my decision, I only have about 2-8 months left in this "window" the doctor said I had to try and get pregnant....basically the last one I will have. It is just an emotional and crazy time for us. It doesn't seem fair that I have this small window of trying for kids and then we are done and I am stuck with this crazy doctor who won't treat me unless I get these vaccines that make me wait for at least another 2 months to try. I feel so frustrated!!!!! Does anyone know how I can get a vaccination record and make it look like I got the dam vaccines? My mom hasn't returned my calls to see if she still has mine from childhood. This whole process is such a mess!!!!!
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